Motivation, Not Here

May you becomethe gracious and passionate subject of your own life.May you not disrespect your mysterythrough brittle words of false belonging. -- John O'Donahue

The trouble is: I don't have much motivation for anything right now.

That is the best way I could think of to start this blog post today. I've been dragging my feet with all things outside of work these days, and here I am, on a Sunday afternoon, procrastinating, trying to write something of substance in this post. I did open Blogger up, and then starting reading through some of my previous posts from a couple of years ago, getting lost in nostalgia, and remembering things I'd long forgotten. Who is that person, anyway?

It's been a relentless push at work these past few weeks. I can't really remember a lot of it, but it has felt like that episode from I Love Lucy where she gets a job at the chocolate factory and can't keep up with the flow of chocolate down the conveyor belt...

Except my work does not involve chocolate, nor was it nearly as amusing.

The light at the end of the tunnel is starting to get a bit brighter, in that we've got some new staff coming on next week. I think the current flow of tasks is slowing down a bit since we're stalled by the lack of movement from the client. A couple of us took the opportunity to just sit down and stare dumbly at our desks on Friday, waiting for the clock to tick down towards the weekend. I'm hoping that we're cresting a hill right now and that the work life is just about to back off to let me live my personal life again.

The hubby and I bought a new bed, and it was delivered on Friday. Needless to say, I have taken every opportunity to justify the purchase. I was feeling pretty run down this morning, so I took some extra time to lie in bed and doze for a while, before flopping over onto my back to watch a few silly YouTube videos on the tablet.

Wait. This is a blog about creativity and stuff. Better think of something creative... Here's a quick food shot from dinner tonight:

Oddly, despite my lack of motivation these days, my current knitting project is coming along in leaps and bounds. It's a modified version of the Millay Jacket, and I'm attempting to knit it from the top-down, purely because I'm not sure I have enough yarn for it. Each time I pick it up to knit a few rows, it seems to fly off my needles, and I'm pretty sure that, at this rate, I could be blocking this thing by next weekend.

The original pattern construction is worked firstly from the waist up, all the way to the neckline, then you're supposed to pick up stitches from the cast-on edge and then knit downward to the bottom. This creates a waist stay, which is supposed to add some stability to the garment and to make the waist STAY in place, rather than riding up or floating off. I'm debating whether or not I will create my own waist stay by casting off at the waist and then picking up the stitches again. I'm sort of dubious as to whether or not it will make a difference. I'm really just knitting along until I reach the waist, and then, well... we'll see what I feel like doing then.

Given that I don't even know what I feel like doing now, trying to predict what I'll feel like in a week is pretty much out of the question.

It looks so tiny lying there, but it's doing the annoying thing that lace does by squeezing itself together so that it looks like nothing more than a crumpled fishing net. It is quite lovely when it is stretched out, as I tried to show here:

In spite of my melancholy, spring is doing its best to peek around the corner at me. The cherry blossoms are trying to burst into bloom, and today was beautifully sunny if not all that warm. And, in spite of my lack of motivation, every so often, a hankering to knit a super-complicated lace shawl pops up. Maybe that'll be just the ticket.

You know what else would be just the ticket? Some ice cream. Have a nice Sunday, all.