How Hard Could it Be?

 "How hard could it be?"

Those are always the words uttered by a fool. And this is the fool that uttered them. And I continue to utter them when I encounter projects I've never tried before.

It started out with a construction drawing I bought from an artist last summer. She had obtained a bunch of drawings from an architect who was retiring, and she took them home and applied some plant-based dyes to them. When I saw them, I thought immediately of my time working at a construction company, and my then-boss and now-friend who taught me how to read and interpret them so well that I eventually was able to do my own material estimates for projects. I am still entranced by them, still interested in what they are showing. 

This drawing was on some kind of translucent paper, kind of like vellum paper. When I held it up to the light, I could see swirls of yellow, pink, blue and green. I decided to take it home. Eventually, I thought it might make an interesting lampshade.

I searched around online for some ideas of how I might do this. I imagined some kind of cube-shaped desk lamp, and eventually I came upon this video. I watched it a few times and stored it away in my brain to try out later.

A few weeks ago, I watched the video again, made some notes, and then set out to get some supplies. The thing is: I have little to no experience with buying my own wood materials. I barely even know where I would go to find wood of the dimensions I needed. I eventually ended up buying some 1 inch x 1 inch garden stakes from the local hardware store, as well as some square wooden dowel from Michaels. The garden stakes weren't quite the right dimension (they were slightly smaller), but I decided to give it a go.

I marked out the lengths I needed and gave them a good sanding, then I realized that there were too many pitted areas of loss on them. I sent the hubby on the hunt for some wood putty, then applied it to the uneven surfaces, waited for it to dry and then sanded them again. I got out a hacksaw and cut the lengths (in my kitchen, because where else would I do that?) and then sanded some more. 

I spent ages holding bits of wood together until the wood glue dried until I ended up with the one of the frames, then realized I didn't have enough of the smaller dowel to finish the other frame.

I waited for a delivery of wooden dowels, then built the smaller frame.

I spraypainted the frames and waited for them to dry. It took FOREVER. And then I decided I hated the glossy look of them and got out my trusty acrylics and mixed my own paint. I should have just gone with that in the first place, but hey, why do it the easy way when I can waste time doing it wrong first?

Then it was time to get brave enough to cut the paper to the right size. Since it was all folded up in my closet, I decided to iron them a bit to get some of the wrinkles out. I felt like a butler in Downton Abbey, ironing the newspaper for his Lordship.

Another session of glueing... and then I had the lamp shade finished.

I had to build a platform for a battery-powered LED light to sit on, because I was way too chicken to put in a wired light bulb into it. I am no electrician, and the last thing I need to do is build a fire hazard.

I thought I was home free... but I really wasn't. Putting the lamp shade and the frame together was supposed to be another woodglue session, but the darn thing just kept toppling over.

I got out a drill and built up the base with more dowels and wood.

I got out the glue gun and tried sticking the lampshade to the base. No go.

Finally, I pulled out some 3M strips and stuck them onto the frame and the lampshade. Success! And it was even straight!

And here it is lit up. It's truly lovely:

The light bulb actually changes colours: red, orange, green, blue, purple... and you can even set it to cycle smoothly from one colour to the next. I'm very impressed with that purchase. 

And where is it now? I gave it to my then-boss and now-friend. We've both had rough years. I thought of him the whole time I was building it. It's going into his new office. And he's very happy with it, as am I.

But man, I'm never building another lamp again...

But who am I kidding? Something else like it will come into my brain at some point, I'm sure.